I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
