I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
