i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
my god I love twenty year old dicks
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Randomize
