This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
