it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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