We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
