garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
