Ambien. No doubt about it.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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