that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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