I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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