hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
what day is it and did you see me today?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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