We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Found the puke drawer
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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