med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
