Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
