I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize
