I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
