I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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