You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
