On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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