I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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