I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
