bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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