how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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