Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
We are all done wearing pants today
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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