Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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