I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
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