we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
