Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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