Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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