your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I checked into jail on foursquare
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
