I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
