the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize