are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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