I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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