My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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