So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
