Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
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