I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
