Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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