You don't have asthma, your pregnant
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
How naked do you want me to be?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
