I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
