literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
