Buhtt sex?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
