I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
