Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize
