When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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