I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
