She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
