the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
