Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
