in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
